Friday, September 21, 2012

A Just Cause

That's right biz-nitches!
Before I get into my post I would like to direct everyone's attention to Dude Write and more specifically the fact that I, once again, won the Diamond Man Card for my Sticky Situation post.  With this win, I now have a total of nine, count them nine Man Cards since entering the Dude Write Challenge.  I also need to congratulate all of the other winners for their posts and deserving Man Cards.  All of the posts were read-worthy and fantastic, go on over and check them out if you haven't done so already.

So I did my daily routine this morning AFTER my normal routine that you have already read about.  I got in my truck, drive to my first customer and then I set up camp for twenty minutes or so to check emails, Facebook, Twitter and my blog comments.  Normally I start with Facebook and scroll my way down to where I left off the night before.  I usually enjoy catching up with friends and family, reading the occasional humorous Ecard and getting my morning Star Wars fix.  Sure there are the Fakebookers and needy status attention seekers, but most of the people on my friend's list are there because I genuinely enjoy reading their posts.

Recently though, there has been a disturbing trend happening.  It's not the political status update trend, it's not the crappy Instagram picture postings, nope not at all.  It's when you are scrolling down your Facebook homepage and then BAM! you're hit with the picture of a baby who has a tumor the size of a grapefruit, a five year old with obvious hand prints welted on her face or even the dog that is so malnourished you can see all of it's bones or worse the dog or cat that is shown to be beaten by it's owner.  Dude!  Way to 9/11 my day right off the bat!

 I know it maybe difficult to picture me as a caring, sensitive person if you regularly read my blog, but I really am and I have a soft spot for children and animals.  It's bad enough that when I actually do sit down and watch TV, Sarah McLachlan is guilting me into giving money to or adopting another pet by showing pictures of these sad, yet cute dogs and cats in shelters with a sad Sarah song playing in the background, now I have to see these images on my Facebook page.  I don't want to see that shit...period.

Do you really think that for every "Like" the fly-by-night organization is going to donate $1 and for every "comment" the subject will be cured?  Then you get the guilt trip (thanks McLachlan) that if you scroll past this picture and story you hate your grandma, want your mom to be raped by a gorilla or your dog will die.  No, I love my deceased grandma, I really do feel bad for the animal beaten in the picture and as a Dad of three Minions, it tugs on my heartstrings to see a suffering child, but here are the two main issues I have:

1.  If I was to "Like" or "Comment" on a picture, my phone, iPad and Facebook feed fills up with notifications that other people "Commented" or "Liked" the same post. (Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm sure I can change settings for this but I don't have time to dive into the bowels of Facebook)

2.  I already give time and  money to various other causes and foundations.  If I was to donate more money, my kids would be the ones in the picture eating a moldy piece of bread and believe it or not, there are only so many hours in a day, the last time I checked it was 24 and most people spend 16 hours combined working and sleeping, so it would be impossible for me to spend more time helping out.

Now, before you call me heartless and mean, think about who is really heartless or mean.  Who took the pictures of the starving children living on the streets of Chicago?  Who took the pictures of the cat that has broken legs and was beaten by some asshole?  Who took the picture of the baby with the alien sized head?  Maybe those people should put the cameras down, sell them and then donate the money to these causes.  You're standing there taking these pictures, go to the local grocery store, drop $20 and give the starving kid a few meals.  This especially goes for the "action" photographers, catching the act live.  What the hell man?  Drop the camera and go kick that dude's ass for beating that dog or even better call the police...dumbass.

I'm all for promoting your cause, withing reason, if you're promoting something like it should be alright to marry your sister or fuck a goat, stop what you're doing, walk out into the middle of the highway and let a tractor trailer hit you BUT if you want to bring awareness to our planet, how pitbulls are treated badly or to help a child with cancer, I'm all for that.  Let it be known...without the fucked up pictures.

One of the foundations I support regularly is the Jimmy Fund, they do telethons and radiothons and show the kids but they don't show the REALLY bad pictures, people get the idea when they see a young girl wearing a Red Sox bandana because she lost all of her hair from chemo and are more inclined to help out.

Back to my original point, 95% of people use Facebook for a source of entertainment and to take a little break from reality and we would more likely "Like" your cause if you showed us a picture of something good that happened to that child or pet.  Tell us what your cause did for these subjects, tell us how Billy survived and Bosco is able to walk again but please stop with the pictures.

See?  I would be more inclined to donate by seeing this picture....


  1. THANK YOU! I was actually thinking about tackling this one, but you've said it all and so well. (The Vader meme = hilarious) I've taken people off of my newsfeed because they constantly post photos of mutilated animals, abused children and in a couple of cases, fetus pictures and representations of the size of an aborted fetus. Sheesh people! I am sensitive to causes too, but when people start using graphic images to get a point across, they've lost me. They have good intentions, but it's just too much. We have a rule in our house. When Ms. McLaughlin shows up, the closest one to the remote gets it. Quickly. If you're not close, you dive for it. And thank you for giving to the Jimmy Fund. My little guy has Leukemia and every dollar counts.

  2. This was a tough one to attempt to be funny about but I think I managed it. We do the same thing with McLachlan, grab the remote and change the channel....

    I did not know your little one has leukemia, wow, I'm glad we support the Jimmy Fund then! We have Red Sox license plates which are 30 bucks more than the usual registration here ins Mass because the extra money goes to the Jimmy Fund, they are a great cause.

    1. You're right - it's a tough subject to write about and still be funny and you succeeded. M2 was diagnosed a few years ago and he's doing well. He's got the kind with the best prognosis and he's going to be okay! And that's because there have been so many advances in the past several years that have hugely increased the survival rate and that's because of generous people like you who donate to the cause. So thank you. And all without horrible pictures on Fakebook! Okay...enough seriousness...fart joke please! ;)

    2. OK, I got one, actually it happened this morning. I was getting breakfast for the Minions and #3 let one rip...LOUD. I looked at him and he actually blamed a duck...where did he get that from????

  3. Point well taken - we could be moved without uber depressing photos and video.
    You've got a little Sam Kinison going here. Do you remember his World Hunger rant? He too suggests the camera men stop filming and start handing out sandwiches.

    1. I do remember Sam and actually I tend to model a little bit of my humor after him, when I was writing this I was in fact thinking about his rant on World Hunger, I tried to change it up a little though...R.I.P. Sam

    2. Saw Sam perform when I was in college... R.I.P. indeed.

  4. Congrats on your win over at Dude Write, Kevin.

    I used to be on my Facebook everyday but between the politics, religion and now the depressing pictures I rarely get on there anymore. I'm like you, I want the "fun" FB back.

  5. Congrats on another Dude Write win! I also hear ya on the new Facebook trend with those pics. My FB was actually pretty crazy this weekend when 2 friends got into a scuffle on FB. I will never understand why ppl do this, but since it's my day off I am not going near facebook today and am screening my calls today. :/