Monday, April 1, 2013

A to Z Challenge: Adoption

Holy crap on a cracker!  Is it April already?  I could have sworn that April was still a couple of months away...oh well, it's time for the A to Z Challenge and this is Day 1!  In case you're wondering what the A to Z Challenge is let me fill you in.  For the entire month of April bloggers from the world over write a blog post every day with the exception of Sundays...hey even God had a day of rest.  You are supposed to start with the letter A and finish with the letter Z, what a concept huh?

First and foremost I would like to start the A to Z Challenge off with thanking Arlee Bird, he is the founder and birther of the challenge, go and read his blog HERE.  It's also convenient that his name starts with the letter A.  Thank you Arlee for creating this beast from hell, I appreciate it....

So here we go, buckle up and enjoy the roller coaster ride that is known as April...

I have a friend and his wife who are looking to adopt.  They already have a nine year old son but can't have anymore so they have decided to start the adoption process.  I think it's a great idea and I have told them many times that I think so.  I mean, they are going to take a child into their home that has had a pretty crappy life and love them like their own.  It warms the cockles of your heart (there's that word again...cockles).

I understand how children end up in adoption and I understand that for the safety of the child they need to make sure the new family and their house need to be up to standard but I have simple question....

Why the fuck can a white trash pieces of feces be allowed to give birth to an innocent baby with no issue, licenses or inspections but two teachers, with Masters Degrees, married ten years and are respected in the community have to go through a process longer than moving to a different county?

The things they have told me they have to do in order to adopt a kid is crazy!  First they have to pay to apply to adopt...pay. to. APPLY. to. adopt.  Meanwhile Billy Bob and Carly Rae drink a thirty rack of Schlitz and fornicate.  They didn't have to pay for anything, even the beer, they stole that from Billy Bob Sr.'s fridge in the garage.

After paying the application fee, they have to wait more than a year.  Meanwhile, B.B. and C.R. wait about nine months and their "bundle of joy" comes barreling out of Carly Rae's deflowered slut tunnel.  In most cases the poor kid isn't finished cooking and they arrive a tad bit earlier.

Once they are approved to adopt, they have to child proof their house and have it inspected until the adoption services deem it ready for the child.  Now, Billy Bob and Carly Rae pop the kid out, leave the hospital and stop at the packy on the way back to the trailer (not that there is anything wrong with living in a trailer).  They celebrate the home coming of Billy Bob III by downing the same thing that got them into this predicament to begin with.

After they pass the inspections, they are now instructed to go back to school.  They have a Master's Degree in education and they have to go back to school to learn how to raise another kid.  This is being done when B.B. and C.R. don't even have a G.E.D.

Even after they have completed the adoption process and have welcomed their new child home, they have to go through a few after adoption inspections.  Guess what?  No one checks in with Billy Bob and Carly Rae while they leave Lil' Billy Bob in the truck while they go into the bar.

What the hell people?

Ackbar
Well I'll see you tomorrow for letter B and by the way, I'm linking up with Mod Mom over at the I Don't Like Monday's Blog Hop.

38 comments:

  1. I feel the same way about animal adoption, though to a slightly lesser degree. Any idiot can walk into a pet shop and buy a puppy. Meanwhile, to adopt a puppy they have to come over to your house and make sure you have a suitable living environment, they have to do interviews with you, they have certain guidelines about which animals it can live with (oh you have a cat? This puppy doesn't like cats) and then of course there are all the fees. No wonder people just buy dogs from pet stores.

    "Hi, I want this dog."
    "Okay, give me your money."

    Transaction done. It's like buying a damn candy bar.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's funny how similar kids and animals are, from smell to raising one.

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  2. I agree, the whole thing just seems ass-backwards. I have a cousin who was adopted and I know my aunt and uncle had to jump through a ridiculous amount of hoops to adopt him

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    1. The whole process is long and dawn out, but so far they are doing great and waiting.

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  3. That isn't right. The very, long process must be putting alot of willing people off adoption.

    But I couldn't help laughing so much at this:
    "Meanwhile Billy Bob and Carly Rae drink a thirty rack of Schlitz and fornicate. They didn't have to pay for anything, even the beer, they stole that from Billy Bob Sr.'s fridge in the garage."
    Hahahah!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's why people adopt ala Angelina Jolie...out of country.

      Thanks! I try to put humor into everything I see.

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  4. I completely agree. I think there should be a test people have to pass before they can have kids! It's crazy the amount of BS loving people who want to take a child into their home have to go through to get the chance to adopt.

    I think adoption is a wonderful thing. I hope that someday I'm able to afford the process. I'd love to be able to give a child a loving home.

    Visiting via A-Z.

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    Replies
    1. That's what blows my mind, you have to pay to adopt.

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  5. This is why my aunt and uncle adopted a baby from another country - and that was thirty-some-odd years ago. I can only imagine how much more difficult it is now. But in the end, hopefully they have just the addition they need for their family.

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    Replies
    1. Even other countries are cracking down, I read an article about a couple who wanted to adopt a Russian baby and Russia said no.

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  6. I have a cousin who, in general terms, is a crack whore. She's 25 and has had 9 pregnancies. And doesn't have one of them. My other cousin adopted 2 of them, and they gave the mother so many chances it was ridiculous. She would fail drug test after drug test and they would say, let's give her another chance. When the whole time, the 2 kids are staying with my other cousins and they can't adopt them until the court deems the mother unfit.

    Finally, after 2 years of living with them, they still have to jump through all the hoops of adoption. It was ridiculous.

    BTW - The 2 adopted kids called their new family "Our Forever Family" at the adoption party. That was priceless.

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    Replies
    1. No offense to your cousin but that is why you should have to have a license to breed.

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    2. In one hearing, the judge actually asked if he could order her to have her tubes tied. That didn't go over so well, but I definitely agreed.

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  7. First of all, OMG "deflowered slut tunnel" is my new favorite phrase! Thank you for that.

    Second, it breaks my heart that people have to struggle to adopt. I get that the states want to make sure they aren't signing kids over to some child porn ring or human trafficking scam, but seriously, if we aren't requiring people to take a test to procreate why did we need such stringent guidelines for adopting?

    I think of it this way, anybody should be encouraged to adopt if they want because at least we know that that child they bring home is there because it is a wanted.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. I agree with the guidelines and understand wanting to put them in safe homes but it's still crazy.

      If you liked that term, you should search back in my blog, I have a ton of them.

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  8. My aunt and uncle, two of the kindest people on god's Earth, were turned down by the adoption agency, as they were deemed to old. Meanwhile, Casey Anthony is pregnant again...

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    1. Oh good, I was hoping that freak of nature would poop another kid out to murder.

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  9. It's totally ridiculous the hoops they have to jump through. I blame the lawyers. And the asshats who become foster parents just for the paycheck and then neglect the kids.

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    1. That's a whole different blog post, foster parents. People need to go through the hoops for adoption but foster parents can "help" and get paid for it. Most are great families but some should be banished.

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  10. Cute pictures! New follower here. I'm stopping by from the "A to Z Challenge" and I look forward to visiting again!

    Sylvia
    http://www.writinginwonderland.blogspot.com/

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  11. They have to go to school to be able to adopt?
    Good luck with your friends going through the process!

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  12. I worked in adoption for many years - in fact, my first published picture book is about adoption. Check it out! Nice to have found like minded folk. Please visit and become a member at http://citymusecountrymuse2012.blogspot.com/ where we are posting an original poem every day during the A-Z challenge.

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  13. Thanks for linking up to the hop Kevin! I wish your friends well and hope they get to adopt a child.

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    1. You know me, always willing to hop on with you.

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  14. Unfortunately, not everyone is responsible enough to adopt a child. Probably good to have a few things in place to sort out the troubled ones. I understand your frustration, but I wouldn't want just anyone adopting a child either.

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    1. No I get the rules and regulations and agree to make sure everything is up to par, but when you think about it any idiot can get pregnant

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  15. It is a quizzical/annoying thing! I hope things all go well!

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  16. Sounds like a frustrating process but I'm sure it's better to ensure the child is going to a good home with good parents.
    Good "A" post!

    Keep Calm and A-Z
    An A-Z of learning English
    Round the world from A to Z

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  17. Stopping by from the A-Z list. Your A post is funny but sad at the same time.
    Have a great month.
    Margot

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  18. Great comparison! I think about this so much, couples that are wonderful who can't have children, and horrible, trashy parents who can pop out kid after kid. I had an cousin who had three kids taken away, all at separate times. After the first two, they just took the third baby away right in the hospital.

    Another thing that's screwed up...I have recently started the process to become a foster parent, and it's a super long process, too, although you don't have to put out any money. The sad thing is, at least in Michigan, they recruit foster parents from the welfare rolls, so it's not a huge shock when they accuse people of doing it for the money. It's not much money they give you per kid, but when you have no money, a little bit seems like a whole lot.

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  19. You make very valid points, while making me laugh. Well done.

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  20. Holy shit Kevin this is freaking hilarious, I wish I knew about this before. It totally enlightens me to a different side of you.And just saying I read all three books.....:) and I liked it.

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