It's A Trap Thursday!

It's Thursday again!  And that means it is time for Theme Thursday.  Every Thursday a bunch of talented bloggers and me, do a blog post on Thursday of a particular Theme...clever huh?  This week we decided to let our imaginations run wild and we each came up with a few questions for the other bloggers to answer.  The deal was to pick at least ten questions but you can do more if you'd like.

 I knew it!  Eventually I fall into the trap again.  I despise doing lists like this, it reminds me too much of high school but such is life, so, being me, I decided to go for the gusto and I will answer all thirty questions, so without further ado, I bring to you....

30 Random Questions Asked By Other People Who You Never Have Met Other Than On The Internet

1.  What's the worst drunken episode in your adult life?
Here's the problem with this question....I don't remember.

2.  What's the dorkiest thing you're gay for?
I would not call Star Wars dorky, at all, period.  But we all now know that I am gay for Star Wars.

3.  What hidden/odd talent do you have?
Most people burp on command, I can fart on command.

4.  Do you have any irrational fears and what are they?
I hate cotton balls.  They are squeaky and send shivers through my body, I hate touching them, I hate removing them from pain reliever bottles and just thinking about them sends shivers up my spine.

5.  Why do you blog?
You guys are way cheaper than a therapist.

6.  If you could have a super power, what would it be and why?
Wow!  That's a great question.  Tough one, though I mean. what does one gauge his response on?  Physical prowess?  Keen detection skills?  The ability to banter well with super villains?  A la Mallrats.

7.  What is your biggest pet peeve?
People who use the term pet peeve.

8.  If you could retire anywhere in the world, where would it be and why?
I would retire to the mountains of Maine and on a lake.  The reason?  Besides being quiet and secluded,  I want to be the smartest person in the state.

9.  Which TV/movie character best resembles your personality?
Hmmmm,  there are so many to choose from but right at this moment I would choose Shrek and I am still battling Dreamworks for realistic impersonation.

10. What's the worst job you've ever had?
I picked raspberries when I was twelve years old.  I got paid $2 a bucket so on an average day I wold bring home $6.  What a fucking nightmare that was.

11. If your readers met you in person, what would surprise them most about you?
If my readers who didn't know me met me in person they would be surprised that I am not a stay at home
Dad.  Guess it's not a surprise anymore.

12. What is your most embarrassing parenting fail?
Failure is not an option.  There are no fails when it comes to parenting, they are referred to as learning experiences and my stint at being a Dad is chock full of learning experiences.

13. What's the worst thing you've done for money?
Do I look like a prostitute?

14. What's the worst date you've ever had?
I went on a date when I was in my late teens, she was a mutual friend of a friend and was normal by my standards when I first met her via the friend.  When I picked her up for the date, she had dyed her hair green, was wearing a black sweatshirt, skirt with striped pantyhose and combat boots.  Needless to say it didn't work out.

15. How did you lose your virginity?
By inserting Point A into Slot B.

16. What is your weirdest phobia?
What if I don't have a phobia?  Maybe it's phobphobia, the fear of phobias?

17. Is there someone you wish you could apologize to?
My readers, they shouldn't have to read through this list....

18. What's your guilty pleasure?
 Having quiet time in the bathroom.

19. If you could commit a crime and get away with it, what would you commit and why?
If I told you then I wouldn't be getting away with it, now would I?

20. What historical figure would you like to spend the day with talking about boys (or Angelina Jolie for the men folk)?
Well for starters, I wouldn't talk about Angelina Jolie, she does nothing for me, maybe Scarlett Johansson or Emma Watson.  But if I could spend a day with an historical figure it would have to be Lord Baden Powell.

21. Is there anyone you are secretly jealous of?
Again, if I told you, it wouldn't be a secret would it?  I will tell you I despise that blogger who wrote the Elf and Shelf post that went viral in like 2.5 seconds.

22. Do you and your mate have a "Hall Pass" list?
What the blue hell is a Hall Pass list?

23. If you could be a contestant on a game show, which one would it be?

It's not really a game show, but I would love to be on Who's Line Is It Anyway?.  I love stand up and improv.

24. Have you ever been caught "doing the deed"?  If so, by whom?
I can honestly say I have never been caught doing the deed, I'm like a ninja, I'm stealthy and in and out quick...wait, what?

25. What's one accomplishment in life you are most proud of?
The births of my three Minions...sometimes.  Sometimes I wish I could put them back up there though.

26. Have you ever met a celebrity?
Yes I have, I've met quite a few celebrities, the most notable though would have to be Kevin Eastman.  And for those of you who do not know who Kevin Eastman is...go jump off a cliff.

27. Which skeeves you out the most; vomit, poop, snot or pubic hair?
I despise puke the most.  Just the smell of it makes me want to puke and with three Minions there is an abundance of puke each school year.

28. What's the grossest thing you've found in your food?
I haven't really found anything really gross in my food, but the Trophy tried killing me one Thanksgiving.  Twice I found a sharp metal chuck in the sweet potatoes.  The chopper broke and she couldn't find the metal shards.

29. What is the most embarrassing thing you've done while meeting someone famous?
I once met Bob Marley, not the pot smoking hippie but the comedian and I tried to pull off one of his jokes for him while he was signing my sweatshirt and I totally bumbled it.  Bob just looked at me and shook his head.

30. What do you want on your tombstone?  (The actual stone, not the pizza)
To be honest I don't want a tombstone, what my friends and I have agreed to do is get cremated and then the remaining friends would take the urn to a cliff or an overpass, kick the urn off and say "Later, dick."

So there you have my Theme Thursday List.  If you would like to read about more people who are doing this list, I can divert you to the Theme Thursday Link Up Page.