This blog post is my entry into a special edition of Dude Write where we are asked to write a story with less than 1500 characters, so between 200-300 words. Here is my story about the Rubber Chicken Incident.
I was kicked out of the Holyoke Mall when I was a teenager. I didn’t steal, I didn’t deface property and I didn’t even beat anyone up. I bought a rubber chicken.
It wasn’t THAT I bought a rubber chicken; it’s how I USED the rubber chicken. I wasn’t alone on this adventure either, I had two of my closest friends there with me. Deraj and Nala also bought rubber chickens and Deraj thought it would be a great idea to drop said chickens from the third floor into the food court.
The plan was fantastic, Deraj went to the food court to catch the chickens and Nala and I headed topside to drop the chickens. We were in place and felt like Jay and Silent Bob in Mallrats, I of course was Silent Bob. We looked left and right, the coast was clear.
The rubber chickens plummeted three stories into a dusty fake plant. We never got a chance to high five however, the mall cops were on us. They escorted us into their tiny mall cop office and sat us down. They brought in exhibit A and B, AKA the rubber chickens. When asked why we did it, we didn’t have an answer. They took mug shots of us, issued us papers saying we were banned from the mall for 90 day and confiscated our chickens.
While being escorted out of the mall, we realized that Deraj got away scott free and was laughing at us when we got back to the car. The moral is choke the chicken, don’t drop it.