Monday, December 19, 2011

Ho, Ho, Frickin, Ho.

For anyone who knows me well enough, knows that out of all the holidays throughout the year, Christmas is roughly 3rd on my list (it was 4th but then I turned 30 and my birthday went from 1st to the shitter).

For those of you asking yourselves "Gosh self, I wonder what holidays are in the number one and two spots?", well here you go.

1. My anniversary. Yes I can be a sentimental kind of guy and even a romantic from time to time, this year we spent a wonderful and lovely day in Maine with about 6 of our friends and their kids, freezing our ball sacks off and getting attacked by Shamu, but we still did something and that is what we do, we ALWAYS do something for our anniversary.

2. National Talk Like a Pirate Day. It's pretty self explaining, but it brings back memories of a younger and stupider time.

Don't get me wrong, Christmas is a wonderful holiday, celebrated by both the Holy people and the *ahem* not so holy people. I had fantastic Christmases growing up, I was an only child and got TONS of presents from everyone. Let me paint a picture for you, I was the classic "oops" kid, my parents were older and really didn't have any intention of having a kid (I'm a firm believer that they did the wild thing once, saw what happened and never did it again). But January 15, 1977 I was brought into this world ass end first. I was the youngest of all my cousins and the baby of the family so, yes, I was spoiled until the second wave of kids started appearing. Each Christmas I had a great time, even though I was dragged to Catholic church for my second of two mandatory appearances each year (barring any unexpected funerals or weddings of course).

Each year it turns out great and honestly I have nothing to bitch about...except...

I am feeling overly Grinchy this year for various reasons, but there are somethings that have been making me Grinch more. First those fucking antlers people have on their cars...STOP! And just because you put the red nose on the front grill doesn't me your Smart car is or ever will be cool.

It's like that Elf on a Shelf, it's been around for years but all of a sudden it's making a resurgence. I'm not going to go off on it, I will leave it to my new found favorite blog People I Want To Punch In The Throat (check her out it's really funny), but we have one and we thought we would try it, the kids named it Typhoid or Tylom, or Hemorrode or something, I read the book to them and they named it. Really it is a pain in the ass, but as the days go by I am finding more and more creative places to shove this thing. Yes we have forgotten to move it, but then again we aren't Supermom and her sidekick Dynamic Dad,.

People who wish you a Merry Christmas. Yeah, I said it. However it's not THAT they say it, it's HOW they say it. With the political correctness crap happening lately, some people have taken on a crusade to make sure EVERYONE wishes a Merry Christmas and not Happy Holidays. I say Merry Christmas because I celebrate Christmas, but if I was Jewish I would say Happy Chaunakah, if i were African I would wish you a Happy Kwanza, if I was Canadian I would be saying Happy Boxing Day, hell if I didn't celebrate anything I would say..ready for it...Happy Holidays! My personal feeling is that if someone is taking asking the time to say Happy or Merry anything to you, that is awesome. Take the joyous greeting and smile for shit's sake.

But on the flip side I am taking steps to be less Grinchy. Every now and then I will find a great Star Wars Christmas video on YouTube and post it on Facebook. I also started this holiday season off right by hearing my favorite Christmas song as my first song of the season, nothing beats the Boss belting out Santa Claus is Coming to Town and I have successfully avoided hearing Dominic the Christmas Jackass....god I HATE that song.

Of course working with the Cub Scouts this season have helped a lot too, there's something that makes you smiling watching dozens of little boys dressed in blue singing and handing out cards to the elderly and hearing the thank you for collecting and donating food to a family who needs it.

This year I am going to do something new for a tradition, I bought myself a new wireless router and now I can have my Wii connect to the internet, which means we can watch the Star Wars Holiday Special on the TV instead of on my iPod.

Like most people around you probably have never seen it. It came out in 1978 and that was the one and only time it was every aired or shown. In all honesty it is completely terrible, so bad that even George Lucas himself decided never to mass produce it on video or DVD...and he likes making money on ANYTHING he can that is Star Wars related. The only copies were on tape from those who could afford the VCR back then. Then the future arrived and so did the ability to put things like that on the internet and more importantly onto YouTube. As a Star Wars fan one just embrace all aspects of the Star Wars Galaxy...Jar Jar Binks, the crappy Yoda puppet from Episode I, the Holiday Special. If you have never seen it in its entirety, I urge you to do so, oh don't worry you can find it on Facebook, I'll make sure of that.

Oh and have a Happy Life Day.

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