Showing posts with label Pity Party. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Pity Party. Show all posts
Friday, March 1, 2013
It All Started In The Kitchen
Maybe because it's February in New England, maybe it' because we have been buried under a three foot blanket of snow or maybe it's the fact that I need a vacation but things have been bugging the shit out of me a lot lately. Take the other morning for example...
I woke up for work like I always do and did my morning ritual in the bathroom, you can read about it HERE. After I got dressed I headed into the kitchen like I always do and it hit me, there are a ton things that I encounter on a regular basis in there that bug the ever living shit out of me and I'm not talking the normal dishes in the sink or the last drop in the ice tea container types of things either.
What the hell is with the white crusty shit that falls off the neck of the milk jug? Does that crap drive anyone else nuts or just me? We buy our milk in plastic gallons (we really should invest in a cow the way the Minions drink it) and every single one of them have this flaky, crusty white shit that builds up under the cap on the neck of the jug. When you take the cap off the shit falls on the counter or into your cup. While we're talking about crunchy crap...
I despise crunchy crap in my bread. This has been a peeve of mine for years and don't get me wrong, I enjoy bread, in fact, I love bread but what I can't stand is when people put nuts and twigs and shit in it. No, no, fucking no. Leave the crunch to crust of the bread and keep the inside nice and soft. It's like eating your eggs and finding an egg shell in them, it just sets me off.
Why bother putting the asses on the bread? No one eats them and they sit in your bread box until you have a science experiment with them. There's two of them in each package too! Everyone opens the bread, fondles the end piece like a cheap hooker and grabs the regular slices of bread and then when the superior slices are gone the last end sits in the plastic bag like an old person in a nursing home, everyone pretends not to see them and there it waits to die.
I have lots more to complain about but I wouldn't have anything left over for future blog posts! Thanks to Lori for inviting me to the Pity Party!
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