Tuesday, April 7, 2015

Don't Cross The Streams

...it would be bad.

The first time I ever heard that quote was 1984 and of course it came from one of the greatest movies of all time, Ghostbusters.

Fast forward 31 years and three Minions later.

There comes a time in a parent's life where you are just too tired to deal with your Minions.  11, 8, and 4 year olds are capable of getting themselves ready for bed...the problem is they don't get ready promptly or easily.

Some nights you just don't give a shit and direct them from the comfort of the couch...."Get your jammies!", "Turn the water on!", "Use soap!",  "Dry off!", "Use toothpaste this time!"  You know the usual.
"Dad, Minion #2 is peeing on me."

From the couch, "Stop peeing on your broth...wait, how is he peeing on you?"

"We're getting ready for the shower and going to the bathroom."

"At the same time?"

"Yes...."

"Don't cross the streams."

"Why?"

"Well...it would be bad."

"Why would it be bad?" (or "I'm fuzzy on the whole good bad thing, what do you mean bad?" for you Ghostbusters fans)
"What's going on in there?"

"They're crossing the streams and they want to know why it would be bad."

"Well...try to imagine all life as you know it stopping instantaneously and every molecule in your body exploding at the speed of light."

Blink, blink, blink.

"Total protonic reversal guys."

Blink, blink, blink.

"Right, that's bad.  OK, all right, important safety tip."

Blink, blink, blink.

"In other words, your mom will shoot you in the face with a missile launcher you if she finds more pee on the outside of the toilet, OK?"

"Ohhhh, OK, sorry."

Reason 1,765 why I love the Trophy and don't forget...don't cross the streams.


Who Woulda Thought?



4 comments: